The Bowerman Blague: What Color is RhinoVirus?

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

What Color is RhinoVirus?

When I went to the urgent care clinic last week, the nurse had a series of questions for me. You know, the usual embarassing stuff.
Nurse: How much do you weigh?
Answer: Sigh.
Nurse: How tall are you?
Answer: Same as when I was here last time.
Nurse: Why are you here?
Answer: Because I'm sick.
Nurse: What are your symptoms?
Answer: (cough, sneeze, hack) I have a cold.
Nurse: Is your nose running?
Answer: Uh, yeah (sniff)
Nurse: What color is it?
Answer: My nose?
Nurse: No, the stuff running out of your nose.
Answer? Can't you see it?
Nurse? No, you keep blowing it before I can get a good look.

At this point I'm wondering what school this nurse went to, if she has to ask what color my nasal discharge is. Same color as everyone else's, I suppose. I don't know! Am I supposed to look inside my used tissues?

Answer: I don't know, I'm partially color-blind.
Nurse: The doctor's going to have trouble helping you if you don't cooperate.
Answer: Tell you what, just give me a cherry-flavored placebo and I'll be on my way.
Nurse: Now we're getting somewhere. $30 co-pay, please. And just get some over-the-counter cough drops, they're actually better-tasting than anything we have around here.

In the interest of helping this nurse, who I am sure was just doing her job, I include above an actual photo of a typical rhinovirus particle. I hope it will help her diagnose others in the future.

1 comment:

Katie and joe said...: your smart remarks will get you in real trouble some day. meanwhile, i will continue to enjoy.; December 2, 2009 at 7:29 PM

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If ye love wealth more better liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or your arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that ye were our countrymen. --Samuel Adams
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1) Unpredictability is a strong deterrent. 2) We favor the visible, the embedded, the personal, the narrated, and the tangible; we scorn the abstract. 3) Economics is a narrative discipline, and explanations are easy to fit retrospectively. 4) Good, enlightened (and "friendly") advice and elequent sermons do not register for more than a few moments when they go against our wiring.--Nassim Nicholas Taleb
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Our task is to ... ponder signs without becoming paranoid, to be aware without frantically matching current events and expectations.... Neal A. Maxwell
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Facts are persistent things; they do not cease to exist just because they are ignored.
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Manage things; lead people.
Sane people don't act irrationally; we just haven't discovered their motivation.
Hope is not a strategy
Common sense may be common, but it's not universal!

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Our family mission is to help each other and our extended family achieve exaltation in the celestial kingdom. We believe this is possible only by exercising our faith in the Messiah, Jesus Christ. We show our faith in Him by being obedient to the commandments of the gospel. Examples of gospel principles that help us in our resolve to follow the Savior:

· Studying the scriptures daily, we learn the teachings of the Savior and what we must do to gain eternal life.

· Praying as a family and in private each day opens the channels of communication with Heaven, and helps us be receptive to the whisperings of the Holy Ghost.

· Knowing that clean hands and a pure heart are the foundation to personal revelation, repentance must be continually practiced as we strive to overcome the natural man and become like our Father in Heaven.

· Paying tithes and offerings is an act of faith and charity that places God and His purposes above any earthly pleasure money could buy.

· Sharing the gospel through words and example with others demonstrates our understanding that we are all children of God and everyone deserves the opportunity to receive the same blessings we enjoy.

· Holding Family Home Evening each week helps build a safe harbor from the world, offering respite to our family from the storms of life.

· Sustaining and following the counsel of priesthood leaders shows our understanding that the Lord has once again delegated authority to righteous men to act in His name, and our willingness to heed His counsel.

· Marrying only in the House of the Lord, by the priesthood authority of one holding the sealing power, binds us together in a way that transcends this life and creates eternal family units.

· Researching our family tree and performing saving ordinances vicariously for our ancestors in holy temples gives them the opportunity to accept the gospel and be linked in an unbroken chain leading from father Adam to the newest child in our family.

· Accepting and doing our best to magnify callings accomplishes the work of the Lord's church and yet blesses us and sanctifies us in a way that far exceeds any amount of effort we expend.

· Regularly renewing our covenants by partaking of the sacramental emblems reminds us of the Savior and the Atonement He accomplished for us as individuals, for the Bowerman family, and for all who trust in Him.

The Bowerman Blague

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

What Color is RhinoVirus?

1 comment:

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